Darkest Hour of Night
by Allora Gale
Summary: Marauder Era. Sequel to Second Best. Remus finally has what he wants and has fallen in love. But what can he do when his worst nightmare comes true and he passes on his curse?
1. Chapter 1

This is the sequel to my story Second Best. While I don't think you necessarily **need **to read Second Best, it probably helps due to references to events in the first story. Neither story is that long, easily doable in one sitting. So, yes, onwards and upwards. Hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter world, nor to I have any rights to anything I'm writing about except a couple of my own characters. I do not make money off of writing these stories. However, JKR does encourage fanfiction, so I'm taking advantage of that.

AN: Oh, and watch out for the final installment in this trilogy. It's called Different Sides of the Line. It should be up within a couple hours!!!

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They walked comfortably beside each other on the snowy road through Hogsmeade, breathing in the crisp, November air. They weren't talking but their hands were clasped tight together. Remus would glance at her every once in a while and was pleased to find that she had a small smile on her lips. Sometimes he still couldn't believe that she was finally his. She was the bravest, craziest, prettiest girl at Hogwarts. She was also the only girl to ever, _ever_ dump Sirius Black. He smiled at the memory of it, he'd witnessed the messy break-up with a secret joy in his heart. She'd smacked him upside the head with a book before punching him in the face and kneeing him in the groin. It had been beautiful. But it wasn't like he didn't care about Sirius either, Sirius was one of his best friends, it's just that, he'd deserved it and there hadn't been any lasting damage.

They were heading back up to castle, having already bought their assorted items and having an awkward lunch at Madam Puddifoot's, when she tugged on his arm and they began walking up the path that led to the Shrieking Shack. He bit his lip, but didn't say anything, as they stomped through the ankle-deep snow. The Shrieking Shack was the last place he wanted to go in his free time; the last place he wanted to go anytime. It was his reminder, proclaiming to the world, that there was something evil about him; that there was something that he couldn't control inside of him; that sometimes he needed to be locked up.

And he couldn't control it, not really. He'd managed to fend it off once, to pause it's ruthless attack to save the girl beside him; the only girl he'd ever loved. But it had returned with a vengeance. That had been the worst night of his life and by far the worst full moon he'd ever had. The beast had been furious that it had been bested by the boy and had been sure to take it out of him after his friends had gotten away. He'd had to stay in the infirmary for nearly a week. He'd spent Halloween in the infirmary.

But that was neither here, nor now as they crested the hill and the Shrieking Shack came into view in all his dilapidated glory. He stared at, as though daring it of accusing him of being evil, but it sat there, empty and cold as usual. He realized she was wrapping her arms around his back and resting her cheek against his chest. His arms wrapped around her by instinct, one on her back, the other running through her hair. Her hair drove him crazy. It was just that particular shade so that, while they sat in the Common Room at night, it shone like liquid gold in the fire light. He'd always loved her hair.

They both stared at the Shrieking Shack for a few minute, hugging each other tight before she finally broke the silence. "So . . . they just lock you up in there every month?"

His lips grazed the top of her head and he nodded, "Yeah. Since I can't control it, they have to."

"When . . . when were you bitten?" She asked.

He shrugged uncomfortably, why did she want to talk about this now? Weren't they supposed to be having a good time enjoying each other's company, instead of dredging up the memory that he wasn't just an innocent school boy without responsibility?

"When I was four." He answered stiffly.

The silence dragged on, but his mind was racing. He had to get off this subject, immediately. This wasn't how their date was supposed to go. They weren't supposed to linger on _this._ "You never answered me, when I told you that I loved you."

He felt her head move and her lips grazed against his exposed neck. He shivered and pulled her closer. "I was just so mortified that we'd discussed creating silver woks for the purpose of taking out werewolves when you're a werewolf yourself." She whispered.

He knew he was blushing with their proximity, he could feel her warm breath against the cold skin of his neck. He forced himself to focus. That hadn't been the answer he'd wanted. "Oh? I would have told you that night, if you'd slowed down. You went directly from the article in the _Daily Prophet_ to knocking them out with woks. I felt a bit uncomfortable revealing myself after that."

"Entirely understandable." She laughed. Her laughter was beautiful, it seemed to fill him up and make him laugh as well.

"But you still haven't come to the topic I wanted to discuss." He said after.

She stepped away from him and looked up into his face. Ah, those wide, innocent, blue eyes made him feel like she could see right through him. "Remus, you know I like you. I wouldn't have come here with you if I didn't." She said quietly before diverting her eyes.

Yes, she _liked_ him, but he _loved_ her. He'd loved her for so long and he just wished that his feelings could be returned with equal strength. But they weren't, he knew. Until a few weeks ago, she'd been hopelessly in love with Sirius. He wondered if she'd even known about him being hopelessly in love with her. No, of course she hadn't. She'd only had eyes for Sirius. Give it time, he told himself.

"It's alright. Never mind. Let's just go, it's getting cold out." He said as he began walking back down the path.

"Remus!" She'd caught a hold on the front of his coat and pulled him back to face her. Before he could respond, one arm had snaked up around his neck and she'd pulled herself up onto her tip-toes, pressing her lips against his. His mind went blank for a moment, before realization came flying back. She was kissing him. He'd kissed her once before, in his dazed, semi-conscious state after fighting back the werewolf, but it had been nothing like this. He could taste her lip gloss, watermelon flavored maybe, but he couldn't think of that. His hand was cradling the back of her head, silky, golden strands slipping through his fingers as he kissed her back. He'd wanted this all day. She pulled away, "I just don't know yet, okay. So quit being such a prat."

He laughed before descending on her lips again. The connection that had been made needed to be maintained. He needed her lips. They'd been "going out" for almost two weeks, but he'd spent the first in the infirmary and for the second, their relationship hadn't progressed past holding hands and chaste kisses on the cheek. At time's he'd felt jealous, he knew she'd made out with Sirius numerous times during their short relationship. He pushed the thoughts out of his head, don't dwell on that now, he was becoming dizzy with the excitement of it.

"Lupin!" He jerked back at the sound of his name. Standing in the middle of the path, surrounded by a group of his friends, stood Jackson Finch; another boy who had been in love with Aislin for years. "You're going with Remus Lupin?"

She stepped away from him and for a moment, he felt empty. He needed to reestablish the connection. He needed to hold her. He banished the thoughts, and paid closer attention to what was going on. She hadn't responded, so Remus studied the intruders.

Jackson was surrounded by a group of four other guys. He realized this was most of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. Jackson Finch was the Ravenclaw Quidditch Captain and was most certainly full of himself for being made so. He had short, dark brown hair and brown eyes. He wasn't as tall as Remus, but he was definitely thicker. Jackson was a beater and fit the mold perfectly. He was nearly all muscle, but so was Remus, just more toned and spread a bit more thinly.

"So what if I am?" Aislin snapped, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow as though daring him to protest. He dared to.

"Him? What about me? Or is this just another plot to get close to Sirius. I heard he'd dumped you, trying to win him back I suppose?" Jackson said with a sneer worthy of a Slytherin.

She snorted, "Ha, check your notes. I dumped Sirius, and what about you?"

"No girl in this school has ever dumped Sirius, so I know you wouldn't. You've been in love with him forever."

"She did," Remus said with a smile, "It was messy."

Jackson continued. "And about me, did you ask? I have liked you for years and you've never given me a date. And now I find you here, with _him_, when he's never asked you out before."

Silence fell over the group for a moment, "I'm not quite following your point, Jackson. What is it you're trying to tell me?" She asked.

"You should be with me, not that bookworm, trying to wriggle your way back into Sirius' good books!" He snapped.

"I don't like you, and I've told you this many times." She hissed, grabbing Remus' hand as she began to stomp off..

As they passed the Ravenclaws, sudden confusion broke out. Remus saw Jackson grab Aislin roughly by the arm and pull her away, her hand slipped out of his and he watched Jackson roughly grab her face and kiss her. Something rose up in him, something territorial. Something the wolf inside of him was providing with glee. He attempted to dive at the other boy, but Jackson's posse grabbed him and threw him down, landing a few well placed punches.

This led to a brawl. He was fury again and he could feel the beast inside him egging the violence on. He was a whirlwind of punches and kicks as he struggled to beat them back. He had to get back to her. He had to make that foolish git pay for what he'd done.


	2. Chapter 2

Aislin was shocked when Jackson had grabbed her, and even more shocked when he'd forced his lips on hers. She'd tried to pull away but he was much too strong for her. He was built like an ox, pure, bulging muscle. She struggled anyway, trying to twist her face away but he'd grabbed hold of her jaw and was holding it tight so tight his fingernails were digging into her skin.. This wasn't happening to her.

Suddenly he was gone. The energy she'd been exerting against him suddenly set free and she slipped and fell into the snow. She looked up and saw Sirius dragging Jackson away by his hair, his long black coat flapping behind him in the wind. He slammed Jackson up against a tree and glared.

"Don't you ever let me catch you touching her again." Sirius snapped, "She's Remus'." Then he punched him square in the stomach, Jackson hunched over, then toppled to the ground.

Aislin snapped her head around; Remus was punching at the others furiously. James was at his side, fists falling on the Ravenclaw's as well. Peter stood a couple feet away, as though afraid of getting too close to the fight. The Ravenclaws soon gave up, pushing the Marauders away before stumbling back down the path. Remus rushed over to her, his hands running all over her face.

"Are you alright? Are you alright?" He asked urgently, as though she'd been dealt some great injury, when it was he with blood and bruises all over his face.

"I'm fine." She assured him, kissing him softly. Once again, that giddy feeling rose up inside of her, like it had the last time they'd kissed.

He turned her face from side to side before a dangerous fire lit in his eyes. She was scared for a moment, they were the same eyes the werewolf had looked at her with, then he hissed, "I'm going to kill the little fucker."

"I'm fine, Remus. It's you I'm worried about." She said as she gingerly touched his face. He shrugged and helped her to her feet. She realized her knees were thoroughly wet from falling in the snow. "Let's just get back, I'm getting cold."

They walked most of the way in stony silence, the four Marauders and Aislin; she could tell that most of them were still seething about the events that had taken place. "Thanks for . . . your help, Sirius, James." She said quietly, glancing over her shoulder at the two. They each nodded but didn't say anything.

As they entered the school, they passed a mirror and Aislin realized just how rough they all actually looked. Remus' face was bloodied and bruised, James was sporting a black and swollen eye, and she already had dark, hand-shaped bruise across her jaw.

Madam Pomfrey fussed over them as she saw to their wounds, muttering something under her breath that sounded like "Muggle fighting". They were out of the infirmary within an hour and she could already tell the Marauders were plotting their revenge.

Remus kissed her gently, cupping her face in his hands, before leaving her in the Common Room with her Potions essay and hurrying off after James and Sirius, his wand, menacingly in his hand. She bit her lip, torn between following them and finishing her homework. After a couple minutes, her friend Rebecca sat across from her.

They stared at each other for a moment. "What happened?" She asked.

"Jackson and some friends attacked us." She muttered, glancing between her Potions book and the portrait hole.

There were another few minutes of silence before Rebecca asked in an excited whisper, "What did Remus do?" The prospect of being fought over was something that Rebecca thought highly romantic. She told her what had happened.

She frowned when it was over, "That Jackson's a total jerk. How could he have a bunch of friends beat up on Remus like that. That's not even a fair fight." She said vehemently.

"I'm just worried about what they're going to do." Aislin said quietly, looking back at the door, "I hope it's nothing too bad. I don't want them to get into trouble."


	3. Chapter 3

Remus was still seething. He, James and Sirius were storming down the corridors with their wands at their sides, Peter following timidly behind. How could that idiot have thought he'd get away with it? They rounded the corner and passed the Great Hall. It was empty; supper wouldn't begin for another hour.

"We should get him at supper." James said darkly.

"Something highly embarrassing. We don't want to be expelled." Sirius added just as darkly.

"I'm going to kill him." Remus hissed.

They stumbled across him a few minutes later, laughing amongst his friends and a couple girls in an empty corridor, boasting as though they'd won the fight an not run off like a bunch of cowards. The Ravenclaws looked up as they came into view.

One of Jackson's buddies piped up, obviously not knowing the true events. "What? You three didn't get enough? Come back for more?"

The three of them raised their wands and shouted out their curses at the same time.

_"Expelliarmis!"_

_"Levicorpus!"_

_"Furnuculus!"_

Jackson's wand flew out of his hand before he'd even raised it, he was jerked up into the air by his ankle as though on a hook and painful boils surfaced all over his body. Sirius looked over at Remus with a strange look.

"Furnuculus?" He asked.

"I thought Incendio might have been a bit extreme." Remus said with a shrug.

Sirius chuckled and they turned their back on the Ravenclaws, disappearing before they had a chance to retaliate. They practically ran back up to the Common Room. By no measure was this the end of what would become a vicious and particularly vengeful grudge. This was only the first wave, but it wouldn't do to have a professor catching them in such close proximity to the cursed boy. The only thing that would sooth those boils would be essence of Murtlap.

Suddenly James started laughing. "Did you see the look on his face when we raised our wands? He's a bigger fool than I ever thought he was if he didn't think we'd get our revenge on him."

The others began to laugh. They'd all seen Jackson's face before the barrage of spells had been cast. It was a mixture between surprise and dismay. They stumbled into the Common Room still laughing, but Remus quickly stopped when he saw the look Aislin was giving him. The other Marauders continued to laugh as they flopped down on the couches by the fire, while Remus came to sit across from her.

"What did you do, Remus?" She asked quietly. He could hear the concern in her voice. He smiled at it.

"We taught him a lesson." He replied as he leaned in to kiss her. She pulled away.

"What did you do?" She asked again.

"Furnuculus." He replied with a smile. It wasn't deadly but it was certainly painful. She rolled her eyes and got up from the table, collecting her half-written Potions essay. He tried to kiss her again, but she dodged his grasp and silently went up the stairs to the girls dormitory. "Aislin! Oh, come on!" He called after her but she was already gone.

He heard Sirius snicker by the fire so he turned on him. "You just shut it, Padfoot." He hissed before collapsing on the couch next to him.

It turned out that she hadn't actually been mad at him, but had wanted to fix herself up before going down to supper; she'd still been a mess from their earlier encounter. She re-emerged downstairs in half an hour wearing clean clothes, with her hair fixed and makeup trying to hide the bruise across her jaw. She'd been given some potion to make the bruising fade faster, but it wasn't instantaneous.

He stood up and was about to apologize when she sauntered over to him and kissed him softly, almost a peck, really. Something lurched inside of him, wanting him to drag her from the room and kiss her passionately, away from the awkward stares and glances of their fellow Gryffindors, but she pulled away. The kiss had been much too short.

"Thank you for defending my honor." She whispered sarcastically before grabbing his hand and leading him out of the room for supper. The Marauders had already left a few minutes earlier.

Remus allowed himself to be led towards the Great Hall, lost in his thoughts. He was jealous, he knew. When she'd dated Sirius they hadn't been able to keep their lips off each other. He almost growled, but he forced it back. The wolf would not take over his time as a human. She just needed time. Maybe she was secretly afraid of him because he was a werewolf.

Another two weeks passed, and a full moon. She had nearly begged him to allow her to come with the Marauders. She wanted to support him; to comfort him during his times of need. But he'd steadfastly refused, the last thing he needed was for the wolf to get a glimpse of her again. It's retribution had been brutal last time she'd gotten away.

She'd obeyed and stayed at the school, comforted (slightly) by the fact that the Marauders would be there for him. But what worried him more was that she was still reserved towards him. Their kisses were reserved, and few and far between. He never touched her as he'd seen Sirius touching her; she'd just never invited it. What was wrong? He decided to confront Sirius about it.

They sat in the dim Common Room, across from each other on the two couches by the fire. Aislin had already gone up to bed; having an early Muggle Studies class the next day, leaving the Common Room empty. They eyed each other uncomfortably for a few minutes. It had become an unspoken pact that they wouldn't talk about Aislin's relationship with Sirius. But he needed to know.

"You wanted to talk?" Sirius asked, leaning back on the couch and resting his feet on the low coffee table between them. Remus gazed at the coffee table, his head resting on his hands. That was the same coffee table Aislin had knocked Sirius over with the book during their famed break-up.

"About you and Aislin." Remus answered, glancing up at his friend. Sirius stiffened and sat up a bit straighter.

"I know you have to hate me for that, Moony, but I learned my lesson. I haven't gone anywhere near her." Sirius said quickly.

Remus waved his hand, "No, I know and I forgave you already."

"Then what?" Sirius asked looking thoroughly curious.

Remus braced himself. He knew he didn't really want to know what he was about to ask, but he needed to know. It was about peace of mind. "What was she like when you and her were together?"

Sirius' mouth opened into an 'o' before he nervously laughed. "Why?"

"I'll tell you after. Just tell me what you can remember." Remus answered, annoyance slipping into his voice.

"She was . . ." Sirius glanced back up, "Do I have to do this, Moony?"

"Yes."

"Fine. She was hot. There wasn't a minute of the day that went passed that she didn't want to be kissing me. I had to stop her when you were in the room. She was just fiery." Sirius answered uncomfortably, pulling his hair back from his face.

Remus rubbed his hand across his face, closing his eyes and trying to drown out Sirius' words with thoughts like, _No, she's mine. She wants me most!_ But it didn't quite work. "How long? When did it start?"

"Look, Moony, I don't really understand why you're-"

"Just answer the damned question, Padfoot!" Remus snapped, cutting him off.

"Fine! From the first day!" Sirius answered, suddenly angry. "As soon as she was out of the fucking infirmary! Does that make you happy, Moony? You're just torturing yourself, making –"

"I want you to hit on her again." Remus said loudly, cutting off his friend's tirade.

"What?" Sirius demanded in obvious and apparent disbelief.

"I need to figure out if she still loves you. She just isn't the same with me." He answered in defeat, sinking into the plush couch cushions.

"Did it ever occur to you that she might just feel awkward because she had no idea that you loved her and then –wham- you show up as a werewolf and your love for her is the only thing that's ever been able to fight back the beast?" Sirius argued.

Remus didn't say anything for a few minutes, "Are you going to do it?"

"Yeah. Fine. For one week I will do all in my considerable power to woo her." He said bitterly, "But I'm telling you now that she hates me. The day we got in that fight was the first time she's said anything nice to me since bashing me in the head with that book."


	4. Chapter 4

It began the next day. Aislin was sitting at the breakfast table with Rebecca and Demi, her quiet bookworm friend, when she noticed Sirius watching her from down the table. She tried to ignore him, but his attentions were persistent. Finally she looked right back at him, eyebrows raised with a look that screamed "What?". He smiled and winked at her before turning back to the Marauders. She glanced at Remus but he didn't seem to have noticed, being deeply immersed in a conversation with James.

"What was that about?" Rebecca asked, catching the wordless exchange.

"I don't know . . ." She replied, just as confused.

Later that day, during Transfiguration, a second mysterious exchange took place. They were changing toads in to teapots, when Remus' toad suddenly jumped from their desk and took off across the room. Remus hurried away to catch it and Sirius seemed to suddenly appear next to her.

"Hey." He said quietly, holding one of her toads still as she easily managed to transfigure it. She added it to the pile of teapots she'd already made before replying.

"What do you want, Sirius?" She asked, finally looking at him.

He smiled again, that charming smile that had rendered so many girls' brains useless. It didn't work on her though, she knew how his mind worked. She'd studied him for years, trying to figure out how to change his ways. Now, she knew better. There was no changing Sirius Black, he was, and always would be, a pig. She noticed Jackson Finch smirking triumphantly across the room, as though his great hypothesis had just been proven true.

"Nothing, I just wanted to say hi." He answered smoothly, sitting casually on her desk so he was facing her.

She raised her eyebrow suspiciously, "No, really, Sirius, what do you want?"

Before he could answer, Remus returned with his toad. He slammed it onto the desk, it was dazed and didn't move, and gave Sirius a meaningful look. Sirius raised his hands, as though proclaiming he hadn't touched her, before moving on back to his desk.

"What was that about?" Remus asked, his eyes darting down to hers from where they'd been following Sirius' progress back to his desk.

"I don't know." She answered, squeezing his hand. "He's been acting weird all morning. I looked up at breakfast and he was just staring at me."

He smiled down at her, "I'll talk to him."

She smiled back, pressing a kiss to his cheek before Summoning another toad from the large bucket at the front of the room. It meant a lot to her that he cared enough to confront his own best friend about his conduct. She wanted this relationship to work; she wanted to feel it this time. She'd been disconcerted when she'd broken up with Sirius and hadn't felt the slightest pang of emotion. Their relationship, she realized, had been almost entirely physical. Not that she was the only one to blame, but she couldn't resist the temptation of kissing him. He'd been referred to, by other girls, as a god amongst men.

But this time she wanted it to be different. Remus was different. Remus was beautiful and handsome and . . . untamed. Every fascination she'd ever felt when looking into the eyes of some wild creature, every time she'd been drawn to a beast by the pure beauty of it's natural, feral gaze she'd been elated. And every time she looked at Remus she could see that natural beauty staring back out at her through his eyes. She wasn't afraid of the werewolf in him anymore, he'd learned to manage it. It anything, it only made him more beautiful, more mysterious.

She wanted this to work. She wanted to feel for him. She wanted to feel empty every time he left her and she wanted to feel full every time he came back. She didn't want the entire basis of their relationship to consist of snogging in the empty Common Room accompanied by lustful groping. She wanted something to click emotionally; spiritually. She wanted to _know_ him and in order to do that, she needed to take it slow, even though the temptation to kiss him senseless nearly overpowered her sometimes.

The next day, however, Sirius' attempts seemed to have doubled. Remus left from breakfast early, planting a soft kiss on her cheek. He had a test in Arithmancy and wanted to study some more for it. Almost before he was gone, Sirius slid down the table to sit next to her. Aislin watched as Rebecca's eyebrow shot nearly to her hairline. Demi just looked down as though uncomfortable.

"Can I help you, Mr. Black?" She asked severely.

He flashed his trademarked smiled again as he watched her, "I just came over to talk. James has gone Lily crazy, Remus is gone off to study, and Peter isn't really the talking type."

"We're discussing menstrual cycles." She said with forced cheer. Rebecca nearly choked on her pumpkin juice.

Sirius bit his lip for a moment and Aislin had to do everything in her power not to break into a giggle. He looked so uncomfortable. Then he was once again the smooth and confident ladies man. "Oh, and which of you is . . . ?" He asked, looking around at the three girls. Demi seemed to wither under his glance.

"Me." Aislin replied firmly.

"Oh, I should have guessed. Moody. Snappish. Anti-social. You're exhibiting all the proper symptoms." He laughed, as though he'd pulled some great joke. No doubt the Marauders would have laughed at it if they'd heard.

"Sirius," She said, her voice deadly calm, "I'm about to stab you if you don't get up and walk away right now."

He seemed surprised at her tone and hastily complied. Rebecca's eyes were wide and she was hardly containing her laughter. Then the damn broke and her peals of raucous laughter seemed to fill the Great Hall. Aislin couldn't help but join in, they were still laughing as they stumbled in to History of Magic half an hour later.

Despite this, Sirius still didn't seem to give up. She was studying that night in the library before supper, trying to figure out just what the Ordinance of 1253 had done for the Goblin population when someone sat down next to her. She glanced up, growled, and looked back down at the text again without a word. But his presence was beginning to make her nervous. She was in a table hidden away in the corner. She'd chosen it for the solitude but now she wished she'd been in plain sight. Then she wouldn't have to worry about someone coming to the wrong conclusion. No doubt this looked like a clandestine meeting.

She slammed her book shut and glared at him. "What do you want, Sirius? You've been acting weird for days." She snapped.

He looked up from his Charms notes. "What makes you think that everything's about you?" He asked with his eyebrow raised. "You're a bit full of yourself. I came here to study and I usually sit here when I want to study in peace. It's not my fault you decided to sit here."

"There's a half dozen chairs around this table, you could have sat at any one of them, instead you chose the one next to me." She snapped, "And you never study. You're family just sends in a nice lump sum so that they'll pass you."

She watched his jaw clench for a moment as he stared down at his notes, then it relaxed and looked up at her, no trace of anger in his expression. "I like this chair. And I do study on occasion, except usually I'm back here so no one sees me." He drawled, "And my family's fortune is of no concern to you."

"Fine. Study. And quit talking to me." She snapped, gathering up her things as she got up.

"Okay, fine. I did come to sit here because of you." He finally said, a second before she would have turned the corner around the bookshelf and been free of him.

She turned on her heel, glaring at him. At least now she'd know what the hell he was up to. "Why?"

"I want you back." He said as he stood up.

She snorted, "Fat chance."

Before she could react, he was in front of her, his hand holding the back of her head as his lips quickly and passionately descended on hers. What the hell? For the second time that year, she was being kissed without permission. She immediately tried to jerk away but his other arm was holding her tight against his chest. How could he possibly think this was alright? Wasn't she dating his best friend? Although, he didn't generally care about flirting with girls when he had a girlfriend, so she figured he didn't much care about flirting with girls that already had boyfriends.

She stomped on his foot as hard as she could, he broke away with a yelp. Her heavy History of Magic text slammed against his face before he'd even realized it was coming. He staggered back, falling into the bookcase before sliding to the floor rubbing his jaw. She turned to leave but Remus was standing behind her, his face completely devoid of any emotion.


	5. Chapter 5

Remus had listened, hidden behind the bookshelf, as Sirius had tried, once again, to steal his girlfriend. He hadn't given him any instruction how to do it, so he'd had no idea what to expect. He'd tried to hold back a chuckle as Sirius had accused Aislin of being self-center, but it had escaped; luckily they hadn't heard. But when Sirius had told her that he wanted her back with such conviction, he couldn't control the pang of jealousy that had erupted in his chest. What was he doing? He wasn't actually supposed to steal her away, he was just supposed to be pretending.

He needed to put an end to it. He'd stepped out from behind the bookcase, intent on stopping Sirius and was met, once again, by one of the worst sights he'd ever seen. Aislin was pushed up against his chest as he was kissing her ferociously. But this time she was struggling in his arms, she was trying to escape. His heart leapt, he was about to jump in and pull them apart when he suddenly released her and her textbook had crashed into the side of his head.

Then she'd seen him and he deadened a little inside. He was going to have to tell her that he'd been the one to sic Sirius on her. And he could only imagine how well that would go, as he envisioned textbooks slamming into his own face. Possibly a silver wok? But she didn't demand an explanation. She didn't care _why_ Sirius had been kissing her, she just wanted to make things right.

She collapsed in his chest, tears gathering in her eyes, "Oh, Remus. Oh, Remus, it wasn't me, I swear. He just came at me before I could get away. And I couldn't get away." She cried.

He soothed her quietly, his hand running against her back, through her hair. He just wanted her to stop crying and it killed him inside to know that he was the one that had caused her heartache. "Go on up to the Common Room, I'll sort this out." He whispered as he caught sight of Sirius glaring daggers at him.

She nodded and fled the library, her heavy textbook hanging from one hand. He made sure she was gone before helping Sirius up off the floor. "I'm sorry." He muttered.

Sirius was still rubbing his jaw, "That's the last time I help you out." His friend answered.

"We ought to coordinate an argument. We wont talk to each other for something like a week and then we'll stage a public make up." Remus muttered.

"Yeah, whatever." Sirius said, decidedly withdrawn.

Remus studied his friend for a moment before realization dawned upon him, "You did want her back." He said. Sirius shook his head but didn't meet his gaze.

"That's ridiculous." Sirius said sharply.

Remus snorted. "Let's just hope you don't steal her from me twice."

"I don't think you need to worry about that, Moony. I think it's safe to say that she loathes me. And if she didn't before, she certainly does now." Sirius said bitterly as he touched his jaw again.

They walked out of the library separately, Remus first, Sirius following a few minutes later. Remus was a storm of emotions as he stalked down the corridors towards Gryffindor Tower. First her was angry because Sirius actually wanted her back. He wanted to steal Aislin away from him again. Then he was elated because he realized that Aislin most definitely didn't love Sirius anymore. Then he was triumphant. She liked him more than Sirius. For the first time ever, a girl liked Remus Lupin more than Sirius Black. Then he was depressed, he'd made her cry. He'd sent her into this situation and it had made her cry. His insides twisted at the thought of her tears.

When he entered the Common Room she was sitting in a chair staring into the fire, her knees drawn up to her chin while small, glass tears trickled down her cheek. She looked broken. She looked up when he came in her tears seemed to redouble as she looked away in shame.

He hurried over to her, pulling her into his lap as he squeezed into the same chair. She buried her head in his shoulder and he could feel her heaving breath and the wet tickles of her tears on his neck. "I don't even know what happened. He was asking me to go back out with him one second and I was flatly refusing and then suddenly he was kissing me out of nowhere. I don't know why. I don't know why. Is it my fault, Remus? Did I do something to make him think that-"

He couldn't bear to listen to anymore. "No, it's my fault." He hushed her. She looked at him with puffy, tear-stained eyes. "I wanted to make sure you didn't still love him." He continued, knowing he'd just dug himself a hole.

"What?" She demanded, her shame evaporating in anger.

"He went too far, he went way too far, I've already handled it. He'll leave you alone now." Remus tried to explain, but she wasn't listening anymore.

"You _planned_ this? You-" She cut off as the portrait hole opened and Sirius stormed in. He didn't even look at them as he headed directly to the dormitory. She began again as soon as the door closed. "What the hell kind of person sets their philandering friend on their girlfriend? That's demented."

"I needed to know." Remus cut in loudly.

"Then you should have just asked! Why couldn't you have just asked me if I still had feelings for Sirius? No! That's not the Marauder way, is it? No, for you guys to do anything it has to include some great scheme and subterfuge!" She yelled.

He flinched. "Fine. Do you still love Sirius?" He yelled back.

"No!" She yelled, pushing away from him. Her eyes were blazing; they seemed on fire in the dim Common Room.

"Fine!" He answered.

"Fine." She yelled back before storming up the stairs to her dorm.

He collapsed into the chair, wondering how he could have done that better when the door to the girls' dorm suddenly opened again. He sat up, she was standing on the landing and then suddenly a book came hurdling through the air towards him. It missed him but before he could say something, the door had slammed shut again.


	6. Chapter 6

She was furious. How could he have been so stupid? She'd expected more from him. Maybe, she thought, James and Sirius might have done something like that, but not Remus. Not the _smart_ one.

It was nearly a week before she spoke civilly to him again. It was Christmas, and it sucked to fight at Christmas time. He was sitting in the Common Room with the Marauders the night before everyone would be leaving. She sat down across from him and the Marauders seemed to take it as their cue that they should leave.

"Everyone! Up to the dorms!" James was calling, using his Head Boy authoritative voice.

Suddenly the Common Room cleared. The group of first years that had been playing wizards chess abandoned their game, and most other students abandoned their activities, leaving books open and sentences half written. In less than five minutes the Common Room was empty. They were left in silence. She watched him, he was watching her, his hazel eyes examining her closely. Then he sighed.

"I'm sorry." He muttered, resting his head in his hands. "I know it was stupid and I know that I should have just talked to you about it. I was just so worried that maybe you were just using me to get back with Sirius."

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." She retorted. "Why would I want Sirius? He's a total git."

"Because he's in love with you again." Remus muttered.

She burst out laughing. "The only person Sirius has ever been in love with is himself. Can we stop arguing about this now? I'm not in love with Sirius Black."

"Why aren't you . . ." He seemed at a loss of words as he waved his hand around, "like you were with him? Why aren't we like that?"

She thoughts came to a screeching halt. What? Was that all he wanted? Lusty groping and passionate kisses. "I thought you wanted more than that." She said, looking away from him for the first time. He just wanted her physically? Pure lust had been enough to push back the werewolf in his mind? Well, it was carnal, and she supposed that was a language the wolf might understand. Her heart seemed to wither a bit.

"I do." He said vehemently, "but I want that too."

"Fine." She said with a shrug. If that was what he wanted she'd give it to him. He'd been more than kind to her, except when he'd sicced Sirius on her. "Are you going home for Christmas?"

He shook his head, "Full moon. I don't really want to subject my parents to that during Christmas. I'll just stay here. I suppose you wanted to clear things up before going home to spend Christmas with your family?"

She shook her head this time. She'd never discussed her family, or lack thereof, with anyone at Hogwarts. It was awkward. "I'm an orphan, Remus."

The color drained from his face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to . . . to . . . I didn't know. Why didn't you ever tell me before?"

"It never came up and it's not something I like to dwell on." She shrugged.

"I'm sorry." He said again, seeming at a loss for comforting words. He moved to sit beside her and to cradle her head against his chest.

"It's fine. It happened years ago, its not like it's recent." She said as she waved the gesture away. Instead, she turned to kiss him. She felt the giddiness well up inside of her again as their lips connected and his arms wrapped around her, pulling her close to his chest. His hands began exploring her back, her hips, her legs, before tangling back into her hair. She took the time for her hands to explore his body in turn. She felt his muscles, hardened from his monthly hell runs, beneath his shirt. He really was beautiful, perhaps even more so than Sirius, and he had the personality that Sirius was lacking.

They both paused; someone was clearing their throat behind them. She looked up, saw Sirius standing behind the couch; looking awkward, and out of place. "What?" She asked snappishly.

"Nothing." He muttered before turning away from them and quickly disappearing through the portrait hole.

The next day almost everyone left Hogwarts for Christmas holidays and they were virtually alone in Gryffindor Tower for the next week. Her heart would wither a bit more every time she'd kiss him passionately, she'd wanted more than this, but when they weren't kissing sometimes she'd look into his eyes and see the wolf there, eyeing her hungrily. The wolf drove her on; she loved that look. Like he was starving and she was the only one who could satiate him. Christmas came and went, he'd given her a necklace with a pendent shaped like the full moon, she'd given him a bottle of cologne in a scent she really liked.

Remus slowly became weaker as the full moon drew closer. He became pale and sometimes, as they lay snuggled against each other on the couch, she would feel him shiver. But he'd quickly kiss her cheek and assure her he was fine if she mentioned it. It wasn't fair that he should have to go through this full moon alone. The full moon fell on the night before everyone would arrive back at school. If only the Marauders would return early. But they wouldn't, they were coming back on the train with the rest of the student body.

Remus left her after supper that night, giving her a shaky smile before leaving the Great Hall accompanied by Madam Pomfrey. He shouldn't be spending the night alone, she kept telling herself. But what could she do? Then it hit her. She waited until after ten before sneaking out of the tower.

He'd been able to stop it from attacking her before. She'd just go down and keep him company. She'd talk to him from the other side of the door, just try to keep him calm. She dove under the flailing branches of the Whomping Willow, narrowly missed by a wide branch, as she scurried into the tunnel beneath it's roots.

The tunnel was longer than she'd expected it to be, and in the pitch blackness it was slow going. But eventually a door came into view, a rickety, old wooden door that belonged to a rickety, old, wooden house.

"Remus?" She called out. She couldn't hear anything inside. "Remus?" She called again, but again the house was silent. She bit her lip, maybe something had happened to him. She pushed open the door a little, then a little more. "Remus? I just want to make sure you're alright."


	7. Chapter 7

Remus awoke to a smell that was unfamiliar, it seemed to fill his nose and make him feel nauseous. What was that smell? He peeked open one eye, he was lying on his side, his arms sprawled out in front of his face. But those couldn't he his arms, they had to be someone else's. They were covered in blood. Both eyes shot open, he was wide awake now.

He sat up and there she was, not even five feet away from him, lying with her back towards him, her clothes shredded in places, her golden hair streaked with red. _No!_ His mind was screaming. What was she doing there? Why had she come? He reached towards her, he was going to shake her awake, she was just sleeping. But he pulled his hand away. No, he couldn't touch her. As long as he didn't touch her she'd be okay, he told himself. He was cursed.

He pulled his knees up to his chest and watched her. She'd wake up soon. She had to. But as every minute dragged on the pit in his stomach grew. What had he done? Tears were streaming down his cheeks now as she watched her, hugging his knees. Why had she come to him? He'd told her a dozen times that he was dangerous. She couldn't be dead, his mind was yelling, she just couldn't be. He loved her.

He heard the door open and glanced over for a second. Sirius and James had come to see him, he'd noticed their happy expressions turn to horror as they took the scene in. "What did you do, Moony?" Sirius accused as he rushed towards Aislin's still body. "You bit her!" He yelled as he scooped her limp frame into his arms.

"Why didn't you do anything, Remus?" James demanded and he tried to pull him off the ground.

"I can't touch her. As long as I don't touch her, she's not dead." He whispered, tears still flowing as he held himself up with his friend's support. "She'd not dead. I didn't touch her."

He woke up in the infirmary the next day, but the chill hadn't left his heart. James was sitting next to his bed, his face pale and worn. "Is she . . . Is she . . ." But he couldn't bring himself to say it. She couldn't be dead.

James looked at him sadly and his heart contracted. She couldn't be dead, he hadn't touched her. "She's alive." James said quietly.

Remus' whole body filled with relief. He hadn't killed her. He hadn't killed the only girl he'd ever loved. The world would right itself again. He'd be fine. She'd be fine. They'd be fine. Everything would be normal.

"You bit her, Moony." His friend said quietly. "She's . . . she's a werewolf now."

Remus' relief came to a screeching halt. No, he couldn't have. She couldn't be. He couldn't have passed this curse on to anyone, especially not to her. She deserved more. She shouldn't have to worry about lunar cycles and her reputation. "No." He choked.

Before either could say another word, Madam Pomfrey appeared at the bedside with a potion in hand. He knew what that was, she gave it to him every month. It would make him fall asleep, it would erase a little bit of the horror he'd just experienced. "No!" He shouted, knocking the potion out of her hand before she could force him to take it. It fell to the floor with a crash, thick, green liquid oozing across out of the wreckage.

"Where is she?" He demanded, sitting up. Every muscle in his body screamed in protest, but he ignored it. He needed to see her. She wasn't a werewolf, this was just a bad dream. And if it wasn't, then Madam Pomfrey was just wrong. He had not passed this curse on to the girl he loved, he just hadn't, he knew he hadn't.

His feet were on the floor before Pomfrey was able to restrain him, his bare feet pattering across the cold stone floor. There was only one other bed occupied in the infirmary. It must be hers. He jerked the curtains opened. Sirius was sitting on a chair, looking like he hadn't slept in days. Remus ignored him, he didn't care about his friend's unrequited love, he cared about her.

She was lying on the bed, the scratchy infirmary blanket pulled up to her breasts. He could see a bandage on her left shoulder. This wasn't happening, he told himself over and over again, this is just a dream, but you need to do what it says. He reached out and pulled the bandage away, it's adhesive back ripping away from the skin. She gasped at the sharp pain and looked up at him.

He first thing he saw was the bite, it was swollen and scabbing over. The next thing he saw was her eyes. He stepped back. No. This couldn't be. But it was. Her eyes had changed. No, not changed, he told himself. They were still wide and blue, but he could see himself in her eyes, he could see the monster. He had to do something, he had to take it back. But there was no cure. There was no way to take back the curse.

He collapsed onto the bed next to her, burying his face in her hair, "I'm so sorry," He gasped between wrenching sobs.


	8. Chapter 8

She was released from the infirmary a week later, being told that the bite would never heal completely. She'd be scarred by it for the rest of her life. She didn't care. She didn't care about anything. Her life was gone now. As she sat down to breakfast in the Great Hall she was aware of the rest of the student body trying to get a good look at her. She ignored them and filled her plate. She'd lost everything. Not only did she not have a future but she didn't have any friends anymore either. Someone had let it leak that a werewolf had bitten her.

She hadn't seen Demi since she'd been released from the infirmary and Rebecca was sitting down the table surrounded by a group of girls she had also used to associate with. They gave her worried glances, but none approached. She'd lost all her friends. The only ones who had stood by her were the Marauders. They were used to having a werewolf in their midst. But it annoyed her. Remus was distraught most of the time, and miserable, still obsessing over biting her. James was now dating Lily and spent most of her time in the other girl's company. Peter was quiet as ever. And Sirius, well, Sirius just wouldn't leave her alone. He seemed to think it was his fault because he'd left him alone on the full moon without company. She told him off immediately.

They just made her angry. How was she supposed to move on with her life if they just wouldn't let it go? She just wanted to be alone sometimes, she didn't want them all staring at her in concern or whispering about her behind her back. And she could hear them, her hearing had grown better, as she listened behind the door in her dorm as they discussed how worried they were that she was falling into a depression. She wasn't depressed, was she?

She looked in the mirror and shook her head. How could she be depressed, she looked beautiful, didn't she? She stopped herself, gazing hard at her reflection. She'd never called herself beautiful before, sure attractive or pretty, but beautiful was pushing it. She wasn't one of those girls that the boys stopped to look at when she walked by. Well she was, but it was only because of her new condition. Now as she looked in the mirror she saw beauty in herself. What had changed?

It didn't take her long to figure it out. It was her eyes. They were wild, like Remus'; one of the things that attracted her to him so much. They had the same eyes, they held the same look in them and she found them beautiful. Thinking about his eyes brought up a stirring emotion in her stomach. She glanced at the clock, it was already eleven, but maybe he'd still be up. She needed him.

She flew down the stairs and glanced around the dark Common Room. She saw him, sprawled across the couch looking thoroughly miserable. Their eyes met but his were dead. She growled and was about to turn back up the stairs when they suddenly came to life, wild and hungry. They practically dove at each other, searching for the other's lips hungrily, as though their lives depended on it.

She was filled with elation and hunger and something territorial. He was hers and no one else's. No one would touch him but her. They fell asleep on the Common Room floor together hours later, wrapped tightly in each other's embrace.

Later that week the full moon rose and she was full of nervous energy. Remus told her it was different for everyone, she wondered if it would hurt. What if it was excruciating? What if she had to go through that torture every month for the rest of her life? Could she bear it?

Madam Pomfrey led them into the Shrieking Shack, locking the door behind her when she left. Her skin felt numb, it was tingling. She looked down at her arms, they were growing fur, a great, thick, white and grey coat. She looked at Remus but his snout was already extending, he was already covered with a thick mottled coat.

She seemed to black out, she didn't remember what happened, but when she next became aware of herself she was growling ferociously, hackles raised, at another wolf. He was growling back. He was in her territory. He wouldn't leave. This place was hers. He suddenly barked and snapped at her, she jumped back in surprise before diving at him, her teeth sinking into the thick fur and fat on the back of his neck. She felt drunk. She was powerful, she had the one thing so many people searched for; power.

He howled and shook her off, it echoed loudly in the broken down shack, she skidded across the floor and howled in return. _"Let's run."_ She howled, _"We are not pets to be kept caged. We need to run. We need to feed."_

He only growled at her, turning his back on her. She barked ferociously "_Coward!"_

He turned on her again, diving at her, she felt his teeth sink into her leg. She yelped and whimpered. He growled again and let her go, turning away from her again. She bit him before we was out of reach. "_You're weak. You're no alpha. Omega."_

They continued to fight. She lost consciousness again as the wolf took over. She awoke to find herself in the infirmary. She was alone, it was quiet and she was sore all over. She whimpered and was surprised by how canine it had sounded. She looked down at herself, no, those were hands, not paws. She forced the thought out of her mind and sank back down into her pillow. Sleep overcame her instantly.


	9. Chapter 9

Remus watched her closely; she was still sleeping. That had been the worst full moon he'd ever had. He had had to fight the wolf tooth and nail the whole night, keeping her under control. And she'd been furious at him for not giving in to her. She'd accused him of all sorts, trying to coerce him into helping her break out of the Shrieking Shack.

She scared him while she was transformed, she didn't seem to have qualms with what she was. She didn't seem to care that if she'd gotten out she might have killed someone or passed on the curse. That was unfair, he told himself, it was only her first time. She didn't know how to control it yet, how to separate herself from it within her mind.

But she'd enjoyed it. She'd boasted about and reveled in her power, she'd wanted to use it. She was nothing like he was, usually content to sleep unless in a fury. Maybe she was always in a fury. He looked at her again and noticed she was watching him back. For a second he could have sworn he'd seen disgust in her eyes, but it was gone too soon to tell and replaced with a smile.

"How'd I do?" She asked, her voice crackled, it was hoarse from all the howling they'd done. Didn't she remember?

He shrugged, "Fine." Unable to tell her what he really felt, what she'd really done. Unable to tell her that she frightened him or that she was power hungry. He sheltered her, he would be her pin cushion so that she wouldn't have to know what she said or did.

But there was no denying it; she'd changed. After her first moon she'd changed inexplicably. For days after the transformation, she would avoid him, her eyes cold, her face set emotionless. Then, after a week she would sneak into his dorm or corner him in a dark corridor and they would be as they had once been, but more passionate. Many nights he'd come in from studying in the library to find her in his bed, waiting for him with the curtains down.

They made love for the first time, the Marauders asleep only feet away as they embraced behind the thick curtains. Those nights, he loved her and he told himself that she was returning, that she was remembering, that she was fighting it. But the next full moon came and she was just a vicious, just as power-hungry.

Her words grew worse, accusing him of biting her to keep her under his control, laughing when he showed remorse for it. It nearly drove him to tears, but he loved her and he would do anything for her; even bear her insults and her attacks. And she did attack. She'd sunk her teeth into him many times, and he'd retaliated, the wolf inside him demanding that he take charge of the situation; that he put her in her place.

They would fight and they both spent more recovery time in the infirmary than had previously been needed. But he still loved her. Nothing she had said could make him love her less, but it was trying. It was a cycle. They'd spend the moon fighting, throwing words and snapping at each other, the next week they'd avoid each other and the following three weeks were spent making love in his bed. He could live with it. He just needed her. She was the same girl he'd fallen in love with when she was happy with him, she still captivated him, and he couldn't envision himself with anyone but her. He just needed to cope.


	10. Chapter 10

The last full moon she would spend at Hogwarts was approaching quickly, along with her graduation. But what could she possibly do after school now? What career possibilities were open to her now? To top it off she was trapped between loving Remus and hating him. He was beautiful but he was weak. He didn't utilize the power he'd been given. He could be strong, strong enough for her even, he just needed to make the choice. But he was content being locked in a shack every month. Lycanthropy was given so that they could be free, so that they could lose control on occasion. It disgusted her that he even fought for control of the beast when he was transformed; nothing that beautiful should be tamed.

But his eyes drew her in like magnets. All he had to do was look at her and she was his, she couldn't resist. Every glance usually ended in passionate love making or, if in public, a frenzied kiss. When he wasn't around, which was becoming more often with the upcoming exams, she felt empty, she felt like she needed to find him, just to have him look at her again. She needed him and she hated him for it.

How could she have let herself become tamed? After every full moon, she would try to resist him, she would try to stand on her own. She needed to be independent. She couldn't submit to him. She couldn't give him dominance. But eventually their gazes would meet and she wouldn't be able to help herself. The wolf became nothing more than an unruly puppy as she fell into his embraces and submitted herself to him completely. He could have done anything to her; she was his. Completely.

A growl escaped her lips at this thought and the second year boy, that had been unfortunate enough to sit next to her for breakfast, jumped and shuffled closer to his classmates. They all knew what she was.

She ignored the boy. She needed to stop the cycle. She needed to find a way to stop herself from falling for him every time he looked at her with those wild, feral eyes.

But how could she do it? How could she leave him without her heart breaking? How could she tell him off without returning hours later to apologize? She'd be miserable without him and he was the only person she had. She'd driven off Sirius months ago, threatening to bite him if he came close to her again. James and Peter had never been close to her, but they no doubt had heard what she'd threatened Sirius and had backed off. Remus. She only had Remus.

She scowled at her scrambled eggs. She needed to do it, even if she was miserable. She had to break his hold over her. She had to get away. She'd have to do it before graduation. But as the days progressed she found herself putting it off. Maybe she needed the full moon's fervor.

Her exams came; she hardly studied. What were N.E.W.T's to her when she wouldn't ever be accepted into society; when there wasn't any career paths open to her? So she wrote her exams, breezed through them without knowing half the answers. She knew Remus was watching her, dismayed that she'd given up, but she just wanted it to be over. She needed to get away.

She'd managed to stay away from him during the course of the exams, just because she was doomed didn't mean that he, with his overwhelming control, was. Maybe he'd be able to do something useful. Maybe.

But after the last exam he found her. He'd been searching for her. His eyes lit up when he'd found her, those eyes. Those damnable eyes that left her weak and warm on the inside. Before he'd even managed to say anything her lips were on his. She _needed_ him. She fought the very idea of it. She didn't need anyone. She hadn't had anyone for years, why would she start needing someone now?

She didn't know when she'd started crying but Remus pulled away when he tasted her tears. "What's wrong?" He asked quietly as he kissed away her tears. She felt her resolve weaken at his sweet gesture. Couldn't she be happy here? Couldn't she be happy letting him be in control. No.

"I'm leaving you." She said, trying to make her words as even as she could. She turned, she was going to leave the encounter at that. She would leave that very night, by broomstick if she had to. She just needed to get away. But he grabbed her arm and pulled her back. She collided with his chest and his arms wrapped tightly around her.

"No. You can't." He said vehemently, his face buried in her neck.

"I have to." She replied, feeling her heart break a little more. She'd wanted this, hadn't she? She'd wanted to feel for him. She'd wanted to feel like she would die without him, and she did.

"No. No. Stay with me. Marry me. We can be happy." He said with conviction. "_We can be happy."_

"No, Remus. I'm leaving tonight." She said, prying his arms away from her. She couldn't stand it anymore. She needed to go, to get away.

"You can't leave tonight." He said suddenly, "The full moon is tomorrow."

She was already fleeing. She needed to get out. She heard his footsteps behind her as she raced back up to the Gryffindor Tower. With a wave of her wand, the last remaining things she'd left out threw themselves into her trunk. Her broom sitting on top. She began pulling it down the stairs when he blocked her way.

"You can't leave yet." He said hardly. Her heart rebelled. He thought he could boss her around, did he? She raised her wand.

"Get out of my way, Remus." She hissed, brushing the tears out of her eyes with her sleeve. She was sure she was dying on the inside. She loved him, but she needed her own space. She needed to be somewhere where she could be in charge. She needed to control her own life.

"I'm not letting you go." He said determinedly, a hand on each banister of the stairway. _He doesn't think I'll hex him_, she thought with spite.

"_Levicorpus_." She said coldly. He was suddenly jerked upside down. He dangled helplessly as she passed. Before she slipped out of the portrait hole she whispered, "I loved you, Remus."


	11. Chapter 11

Remus couldn't believe she was gone. By the time James had found him and they'd checked the Marauder's Map, she was nowhere to be seen. She was just gone. He felt sick in his stomach, he felt cold, he felt like he would never be happy again. He sat in the shack, waiting for the transformation, maybe he'd lose it. Maybe he'd let it take the reins, to go wild. But deep down he knew he wouldn't. It wasn't in his nature to lose control.

He sobbed again. How many times had he cried about her today? He loved her more than he could even put into words. He'd proposed to her without planning it, he'd just known what he wanted and she was it. He needed her.

He transformed but even the wolf was morose, even the wolf had loved her. Instead of tearing through shack, they howled sadly. _They_ had needed her. She'd become something they could both hang on to. But now she was gone.

He wondered where she was, if she'd locked herself up somewhere so she wouldn't hurt some people, or if she was running free like she'd always wanted to, driven by her power and her energy. He howled again. Would he ever see her again? Would she ever want to see him again?


End file.
